Eleanor’s journal entries 3

I know that when I was born, I was a bitter disappointment to my Mother just for being born a girl child. Of course I was suppose to be a boy, an heir in a direct, albeit long line to the throne. Both of my parent carried royal blood and at the time, a boy child born to them would have put them even closer to the throne. Unfortunately, I was a girl and no other offspring survived to follow me or take my place. When they came to realization that I would be their only child, they set upon a different plan. They determined that with both of their royal bloodlines running through me, I could be an extremely valuable commodity. My Mother made it her highest priority to ensure that I was raised and trained to be a perfect biddable wife to the highest ranking Nobles. She was well on her way to success when disaster fell. The Royals whose bloodlines ran through us started to topple and crumble around us. The wars for the throne took place and we were not on the winning side!

I was a child when the battles for the crown started. It was called the Cousins war because that is what it was. Two sides of the same family fighting for the throne of England! That was when everything started to change… that too was when the time slips began, though at the time they were slight and not very noticeable. It was during that time that accusations of witchery and sorcery surrounded the Royal court. It was when the House of York came to power or rather I should say, The House of Woodville… because it seemed to most that Elizabeth Woodville held the true power over her husband, the King at the time!  I know not much of that time as I was a small child and was kept safely away in isolation until the dust settled . It is my thought that the troubles began before that… it all started with the “sleeping” King Henry, who it is said often fell into trances from which he could not be roused from for lengthy amounts of time? That is when the wars began and people began to doubt whether such a King could truly rule. It was then that I was sent away to France to reside with relatives until such a time as my parents deemed it worthwhile to bring me back. I know that they were waiting to see which side would win before offering me up as a trophy wife?  My parents were opportunists. They were in the middle, having bloodlines from both sides, and would go with which ever side won. They cared not about their conscience or the ethics or morality of the situation. They cared only about being on the winning side! I suppose I am a bit like them in some way… I care for being on the winning side because it means my survival! I do question my conscience however and I do feel remorse for things that I have done which I know are of questionable morals or ethics!

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